Timing is key. In order to get pregnant, sperm need to find and fertilize the egg after it is released but before it gets too far along in the female reproductive tract. That’s why it is critically important to time sex right when trying to conceive. Sperm survive for up to 5 days in the female reproductive tract and they should be already present at the time of ovulation (that is when the egg is released into the uterus). You and your partner, therefore, need to determine when she typically ovulates and then starts having regular sex every day (or every other day) for about 5 days before her ovulation. To cover for natural variation in your partner’s menstrual cycle, you should continue having scheduled sex for 2-3 days after her typical ovulation day. There are a number of commercially over-the-counter ovulation detection kits that are available in most pharmacies that can help your partner figure out when she typically ovulates in her cycle.
If you use lubricants for sex, choose carefully. Some commercially available lubricants contain spermicide which is designed to impair sperm and prevent pregnancy. Even among lubricants without spermicide, many brands are designed with sex (not fertility) in mind and can reduce or stop sperm’s ability to swim toward the egg. Diluted saliva, which is sometimes used as a lubricant, also inhibits sperm motility and should be avoided.
Proactively address any sexual problems. Sexual problems like erectile dysfunction sometimes are common in the setting of scheduled sex when trying to conceive, and can be very distressing. If sexual dysfunction is present, consult with a urologist or other doctor to get some help and get checked out. Fortunately, most sexual problems in men are easily treatable.
